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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Includes bonus track "The Lost," a song written to benefit the American Red Cross, to help the families of the victims of the tragedies of Sept. 11, 2001.
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about

The first "solo" effort from North Carolina's Joshua West

credits

released January 1, 2002

Vocals, Guitars and Bass: Joshua West
Drums: Justin Harris
Organ and Electric Piano: Brad Reber
Violin, Bass: Brown Biggers
Backing Vocals: Clay Howard
Trombone: Warren G. Moore

Recorded by Steve Graham
Mastered by Bluefield Mastering

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all rights reserved

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Joshua West North Carolina

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Track Name: Hollywood
First day in a new town
come to catch what’s going down
seems to me no surprise
there’s more to see than meets the eyes

strike a match and take a puff
call the dealer at his bluff
take a chance and catch a big cold
die before you can get old

Peel away the skin from your eyes
so you can see
I’m not so jaded, I can recognize
I’m only being me

Trekking down the boulevard
whores are out and times are hard
with these girls no need for lines
twenty gets them every time

this is where nameless people drown
it’s just a place, it’s just a town
all dressed up nowhere to go
found dead down on Pico

Peel away the skin from your eyes
so you can see
I’m not so jaded, I can recognize
I’m only being me
Track Name: Candy & Kisses
I’m stuck inside my head
come and see me there
no where I can hide
all my wounds are bare
come and make me smile
come make me forget
pack mne down in ice
come make me your pet

Bring me candy and kisses
bring me whiskey and shut my mouth for me
show me my worth in your eyes
show me my place and make sure I see
yeah

I’m going deeper now
you can’t hit me here
can’t throw me aside
control me with fear
watch your words with me
watch your words my friend
Because this is my pain
and I won’t see it end

Bring me candy and kisses
bring me whiskey and shut my mouth for me
show me my worth in your eyes
show me my place and make sure I see
no you don’t want to miss this
I know what you want,
I know what you need
yeah
yeah
Track Name: Chosen One
Billy was a man who never
noticed public frown
asked me for a smoke
I gave him two
wasn’t much for crowds
wasn’t much at all
Billy knew what he wanted
and that was his only flaw
always wondered what kept him going
how could he live knowing...

he said he was the one
he was chosen
he will come again
He’s the second son
yes he knows it
now he’s come again

Billy had no followers
no one saw him
he was meek
and the world was his
He was the son of man
he was old and haggard

Billy knew what he had to do
and that was his last regret
I found Billy in a dumpster
I wonder if I’ll see him again

he said he was the one
he was chosen
he will come again
he is dead and gone
cold and frozen
all for my sin
he said he was the one
he was chosen
he will come again
He’s the second son
yes he knows it
now he’s come again

La la la la oooh
Track Name: Where I'm At
1989 and passing notes in class
so many feelings that he
knew would bnever last
so many dreams of what
he thought that he would be
So many years gone by
I can’t believe it’s me

I never thought about it much,
but I guess I knew it
And I can’t believe the change
though I’ve gone through it

Looking back it’s all the same
as where I’m at now
and I know I’m not to blame
for where I’m at now

1995 and working a dead end job
dropped out of college
to become an urban slob
so many years gone
down the drain that
won’t come back
I just hang my head
and watch my world turn black

I never thought about it much,
but I guess I knew it
And I can’t believe the change
though I’ve gone through it

Looking back it’s all the same
as where I’m at now
and I know I’m not to blame
for where I’m at now
Track Name: I Will
I will always be here for you
I’ll be there when you need a friend
and you know that I’ll wait for you
as long as you’ll be there in the end
I am trying to make a life for you
time to step up and be a man
painting pictures of love for you
Trying as hard as I can
doing the best that I can

and you know that I love you
and you know that I always will
and you know that I’d die for you
my heart beats for you still
just ask me you know that I will

I remember your body
I remember your softest sigh
the smell you left on my pillow
the tears in your eyes
a love that will never die

I always wanted a girl
who made me feel strong
stood by me right or wrong
I knew right from the start
that you were the one
you were the one

and you know that I love you
and you know that I always will
and you know that I’d die for you
my heart beats for you still
just ask me you know that I will
Track Name: Carnival Boy
They’re fencing me in again
And I can’t let them win
It’s me against the world
And I won’t give in

I never get no rest
Your guilt trip’s off my chest
I slowly lose my mind
But that’s what I do best

So play it again, Carnival Boy
We made it so fucking easy
You’re always so eager to please
You’re on your knees
Once again

Do your dance, Carnival Boy
You know we got a lot in common
You hold it all against your mom and
You don’t call her anymore

I’m shouting up to the sun
I’ve barely just begun
I’ve made a list of complaints
And I’m not nearly done

I won’t go quietly
I’m taking some of you with me
I will make a fuss
Until I get my way

So play it again, Carnival Boy
We made it so fucking easy
You’re always so eager to please
You’re on your knees
Once again
Do your dance, Carnival Boy
You know we got a lot in common
You owe it all to your mom and
You don’t call her anymore

Here I am shouting victory
And it’s a fucking joke to me
Crawling from under my rock to see the sun

I’m seldom seen in this place
I don’t like to show my face
Hanging around these people makes me feel
Just like I’m dumb,
dumb, dumb, Dumb.
Track Name: Gravity
I don't want to be in a place I'm not wanted
so kill me
I don't want my mind and my heart to be haunted
so kill me
Kill me fast so I won't suffer
Kill me please, I ask mother
don't let me go on,
growing up fucked
I don't want this life so please take it from me


I don't want to know the hate and pain of life
so kill me
I don't want a mother who can't be a wife
so kill me
don't let me go on,
with a father that's gone
Don't toy with my head, I just want to be dead
Track Name: Dodgeball
They forgot about us
pretend they didn’t care
form a ring around us
circle ‘round the squares
throw the ball and hit us
with a snarl and dripping nose
eyes that penetrate us
aiming high or low

I tired of this game
But I’m not ready to quit
I don’t know which will hurt worse
giving up or getting hit
and it seems it will go on forever

Red rover send Jimmy right over
but now he’s got a gun
All the mothers just scream and hold their heads
saying lord, what have we done
they tried to turn him on to Jesus and
things he didn’t understand
They wondered why he didn’t
play with the other kids
but they couldn’t see his brand

I tired of this game
But I’m not ready to quit
I don’t know which will hurt worse
giving up or getting hit
and it seems it will go on forever
Track Name: Either Way
Can’t turn out the light
Can’t tune you out of my mind’s eye
a helpless soul in flight
coming around tonight
Can’t get you out of my head
Can’t believe what you said
tasting the tears I’ve bled
swallowing what I am fed

and I don’t know if I can
make it through the night
trust it will be alright
I can’t keep up this fight

I don’t believe what I’m told
tear the fringe of my soul
feeling a bit too old
fiotting right in the mold

my voice is clear and loud
my head is held up proud
standing out in a crowd
hinding behind this cloud


and I don’t know if I can
make it through the night
trust it will be alright
I can’t keep up this fight
and I don’t know if I can
make it through the day
I guess it will be OK
I’m gonna live either way
Track Name: Down
twenty five and counting
what do I have left
where life is supposed to start
my fate line was cleft
brown bag my fancy
leave me to sit
what started so promising
has now turned to shit

Got to hang on
can’t lose my head
two feet on the ground
keep my dreams fed
black balled and blistered
thumb to my chin
last drop from the bottle
last stroke from the pen

best seat in the house
here in the mud
some pay in minutes
some pay in blood
every dream has its price
mine’s paid in full
I played the prince once
now i’m the fool

Got to hang on
can’t lose my head
two feet on the ground
keep my dreams fed
black balled and blistered
thumb to my chin
last drop from the bottle
last stroke from the pen
Track Name: Thor
I call you today
on the phone and you say
you’re seeing him
I guess that’s OK
you’re not mine anyway
so go to him

Don’t you know I think of you
more than I should
and I wonder sometimes
if I’m right

I know you’re his
and that means
you’ll be with him tonight

Idle conversation is more than just talk
if you read between the lines
I shouldn’t do this
I should just walk
away and bide my time

Don’t think I want you
to leave him for me
two wrongs
cannot make a right

I know you’re his
and that means
you’ll be with him tonight

I know you’re happy
and you’re in love and
all of those things that you say
when you talk about him

But why do you look at me
and why do you talk to me
and make me feel so dumb
for being hung
on a girl like you
Track Name: California
Coming down
I fall again
scented summer air
a forest of feelings inside her
complicated karma train
loops through her head
builds up the walls that hide her

simple simon says the same
left foot on red
playing the game just to mind her
falls over herself again
tangled in webs
strands of the truth just remind her

California is waiting for her
this is where it begins
and the seasons are getting shorter
this is how it will end

do do da do da doo

California is waiting for her
this is where it begins
and the seasons are getting shorter
this is how it will end
California is waiting for her
this is where it begins
and the seasons are getting shorter
this is how it will end

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